Back From Medical Leave

ATTENTION: This blog is not dead.

True, it has been on life support. But I'm not ready to pull the plug just yet.
I really never intended to neglect it for the last three months, but I've been on a medical leave of absence of sorts.

It all started so innocently, with Park giving Presli some type of cold on steroids the last two weeks of January and the first week of February.

Then there was a week of reprieve before my big ambulance ride.

It was a preschool morning and the kids were both in the car in front of our house when I jumped out to help Park with a stubborn seat belt. Unfortunately, there happened to be a stealthy patch of ice I was unaware of. In Park's words, I "flew through the air" and landed on my tailbone, all of which officially made me his favorite superhero. I vaguely remember feeling woozy, but desperate not to pass out on the street with the kids in the running car, I crawled (that's right..hand and knee style, folks) to the front door. I managed to ring the doorbell, but passed out in Chris' arms the minute he answered the door.

The next thing I remember was laying on the floor of my house looking up into Chris tear stained eyes as he screamed into the phone, "Thank you Lord. Yes, she is conscious now!!!" When I heard the sirens, I knew I must be dying. That had to be the only explanation for my famously cool under pressure husband to be in hysterics. *People, let's not forget that this is the same man that never broke a sweat when a roadside delivery of Presli came into question!

Poor guy assumed I had knocked myself unconscious from hitting my head on the ice. Turns out, I had simply passed out from the pain of my backside. I'd seriously love to know where that "black out" coping mechanism was when I was in the throws of natural child birth, for crying out loud!!

But, other than a month of tailbone trauma and nearly sending Chris into cardiac arrest, we were no worse for the ware.

However, somewhere in the middle of that injury Park came down with high fever and extreme congestion. He got over it so quickly that we never realized it was the flu until Presli got it. Poor baby had the flu and RSV at the same time. And two weeks later that escalated into pneumonia. But, thanks to many prayers, she escaped hospitalization and things seemed to be looking up. That girl is quite the trooper, I tell you. She never stopped smiling through the whole ordeal.

We took a quick getaway to the lake and had a great time with family. But upon arriving home, Chris came down with something awful. It was the sickest I have ever seen him and lasted over a week. His glands swelled up and his voice became unrecognizable. After being tested for strep and mono, it turned out to be an out of control sinus infection. I'm so thankful the kids and I escaped that one, but we came down with sore throats, runny noses, and nasty coughs a week later.

And that is our current status. We are believing the plague is behind us and that the months ahead hold great health and clear breathing. I completely understand if you want to avoid us in real life for a few more weeks just in case:)

And here you thought I was going to give the same old "dog ate my homework" excuse for not blogging. (*Side note- speaking of canines, is it wrong that when Park asked me for a dog recently I told him, "We already have one, sweetie. It just lives at Grandma's house."?)

But, in the midst of Health Crisis '10, we have also experienced many great things. One of which is we have been shown an outpouring of love from our church's Cares Ministry. I seriously had no concept of how much warm meals, cards, Easter baskets and extra special touches could mean to a family in need until we found ourselves on the receiving end. It moved me to tears.

I also have to give the Lord some credit for providing me with many opportunities to be a better servant. I tend to be selfish when it comes to giving of my time and taking care of sick kiddos sure helped me work some of that out. Unfortunately, I'm a bit of a slow learner, but thankfully, our God is a patient God. I didn't always do it without grumbling and complaining, but there were some breakthroughs in the my circumstances will not dictate my joy department.

Some other big things going on in our household over the last 3 months are:

Presli learned, forgot, and has finally remembered how to sleep through the night again. She has taken, refused, and learned to enjoy again an occasional bottle, although she loves her sippy cup and drinking through a straw even more. She is crawling around everywhere and loving her new found freedom. Although nursing remains her primary source of sustanance, she is pumped for solid foods and screeches, "MMM MMM MMM!!!" the minute she sees something coming. So far, she is a big fan of rice cereal, squash, green beans, and sweet potato. And even though she is our little Sweet P, she wasn't so much a fan of eating them. I think she comes by this naturally since I was gagging as I attempted to shovel them in her mouth.

She is also loving being pushed in her outdoor swing by her beloved big brother. Baby girl has been known to squeal in delight as he pushes her to new heights that make Mommy cringe. Those two are already ganging up on me.

My goal is to backtrack and record some posts of updates on the kiddos, but for now I'll just close with some pics.

AND since I've used up all my sick days, if the blog doesn't get updated soon just assume I'm taking vacation time:)

(Speaking of vacation, I'm headed to the Emerald City this weekend. Can I just tell you how PUMPED I am for our church's FLAVOUR women's conference this weekend??? If you live in the DFW area, it is not too late to be apart of it!)

Our Sweet Tooth

Baby girl is already in her fourth month of life and has a lot of bows to show for it. Her latest accomplishment, though?

Welcoming her first tooth!

Big brother couldn't be more proud. Mommy and Daddy are pretty in love with her, too. And don't even get me started on the grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins....

She is growing up before our eyes.

Slow down, Presli Pie. We want to savor every slice.

Glimpses

When I looked at the date yesterday, I realized that it was one year ago that I found out I was pregnant with Presli. God is so good and merciful. She is a constant reminder to me that His plans are so much better than mine.

And speaking of dates, happy 8 year anniversary to my sister and brother-in-law. They are going to celebrate by praying that their boys actually sleep through the night without playing musical beds. Here's to reclaiming lost rest.

My precious baby girl is still sleeping well, as long as someone is willing to give her back her "pa" in the middle of the night. Do you think we could hire out for that task? The pacifier is such a double edged sword. And I'm not sure what it is about mine and Chris' DNA, but we only know how to make children more oral than dental floss. I guess it all works out, though, since Park adores when Presli sucks his cheek and she is more than willing to endure him licking hers.

YUCK.

Moving on to more pleasant topics, we had a very Merry Christmas. I loved how excited Park was about every little thing and it was icing on my cake to see Presli sporting a red sparkly tutu with candy cane striped tights. Presli adored her first "real" baby doll, especially sucking its cheeks off. (What is is it with that girl?) Challi and I were giddy about seeing all the girly things under the tree after years of Santa bringing footballs and superhero paraphernalia.

We had some awesome Christmas services at the church, followed by waking up to a white Christmas. The Texan in me never would have thought that possible! And Santa actually came on the 26th this year because it takes him a little longer to get down to Lolli and Pop's house. But, he did drop of some stocking stuffers to us in Dallas on the 25th. We made the 5 hour drive Christmas morning and Park was very thankful Santa waited to bring gifts until he could get them with his "crothers" (cousin brothers) the next day. He was also thrilled that Santa Facebooked him on his Daddy's I-phone.

Who knew Santa was so tech savvy? Maybe he could teach me a thing or two.

And it wouldn't be right to talk about the holidays without mentioning our Christmas cards. Apparently, I have a history of being overzealous when it comes to capturing just the right shot. After attempt number 15 million on day 7 of Operation "I WILL GET THE RIGHT SHOT EVEN IF IT KILLS US!", Chris suggested it was time to lower my expectations and rely on his superior editing skills instead. Perhaps he came to this conclusion based on Park bawling that he couldn't hold Presli anymore because his hand had frozen solid from her drool. Or, it could have been Presli's obsession with staring at the ground and spitting up on her dress.

I guess it's also possible that the defining moment was me dancing around behind the camera shaking jingle bells and barking orders like, "DO NOT MOVE IF YOU WANT A LICK OF THIS CANDY CANE AFTER THIS IS OVER!"

All's well that ends well since we did end up with some semblance of a Christmas card. Even if it didn't actually make it into the mail until the New Year.

I also completely forgot to participate in Boo Mamas Christmas Tour this year, but I did want to leave you with one glimpse. Last holiday season, when we had been praying for a baby for over a year, I unpacked the Christmas stockings and promptly burst into tears. I had been so certain that by December I would be hanging 4 stockings and the visible reminder of knowing that hadn't happened yet tore at my heart. All last Christmas as I looked at those three stockings I prayed God would allow me to add one the next year. And here is a peek at my favorite Christmas decorations this season:

I praise you, sweet Jesus. Not just for fulfilling the desires of my heart, but for loving me enough to walk this Earth and take my sin upon yourself.

Thank you for constantly reminding me to focus more on that picture than the one that goes on my Christmas card.

Quick Pics

I'm having a little trouble with blogger, but I decided to post anyway. (I apologize in advance if the format is messed up) If I wait until I figure out how to get my toolbars back and why it won't upload more pictures, then it would be another month before I update the blog. And according to the grandparents, that just won't work:)

So, a "real" update will be coming soon, but in the mean time a few 3 month Presli pics should hold them over.....

Baby Doll

Just 2 months and already making friends!


And this one thinks SHE is his baby doll.


Yesterday, Park broke the news to me that he no longer wants to marry me when he grows up. He has decided to marry Presli instead and they will live with Chris and me forever.

I would love to get that in writing, but considering Park got teary this morning walking into preschool because he was nervous about writing the letter "N", I'm not thinking it is likely.Poor thing said that as much as he tells his hand what to write, sometimes it just won't listen:)

Thankfully he forgot all about it when he kissed Presli goodbye and she licked him. The tears were replaced with some joyful giggles as he ran into his class contemplating what color Presli would want him to paint his nickles. (In case you haven't guessed it is N week at preschool.)

Baby girl, I pray each day that you will marry a man that loves you as much as your Bubby and Daddy do!

What Do Halloween And Michael Jackson Have in Common?

The kids and I went to my sister's for Halloween so they could spend the holiday with their crothers (this is our word for the cousin brothers). They just built a brand new house and I am officially in love with it!

And Park is in love with the wide open acreage called their back yard.(BTW-the picture can't even do it justice!)


However, Halloween didn't exactly start off with a bang.


After months of looking forward to being Spiderman with the crothers, Park decided he wished he would have been a cat like Presli.


Apparently, Presli wished she had been Spiderman like Park.

But, after everyone got past their costume identity crisis, we headed out to a party at one of Challi's friend's house. They had lots of games for the kids including one that called for wrapping Pops up like a mummy.


Even Lolli and Presli got in on the action.


As you can see, Presli was the life of the party. Things wrapped up with a hay ride (minus the hay. Thanks to one smart Momma who said she was tired of her kids complain of itching every Halloween so she nixed the hay:) The ride took us trick-or treating through the neighborhood. Even baby Kord was excited.

Can I just say that I never realized that one particular little subdivision in a little suburb of Tyler, Texas was the capitol of the Trick or Treat? There were HUNDREDS of kids. They were EVERYWHERE. I have never seen such mass celebration.

Apparently East, TX doesn't mess around when it comes to candy. Not to mention that they do it in style. Gone are the days of walking door to door. People where on truck trailers, golf carts, 4 wheelers and any other recreational vehicle you can imagine. And just when I thought I had seen it all, we passed something that could only be called a Halloween float, complete with orange twinkling lights and a thumping sound system blaring MJ's Thriller.

Which brings me to a complete and total side note:
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A few weeks ago Bridget and I braved some TERRIBLE weather to go see Fame at the movies. We may not live forever, but thanks to Bridget's husband forcing us to take his 4 wheel drive truck, we did live long enough to make it through the torrential rain and flooding to arrive at the theater. Although, at some point in the drive I distinctly remember screaming the phrase, "THIS IS NOT A ROAD!"

Bridget and I were so pumped to go see it that we had planned this little outing before Presli was even born. However, the "outing" was never intended to be a party of two. After Sarah and Bridget had roped me into seeing Julie and Julia (How on earth did they talk me into a movie about cooking? After one of the million times I went to the bathroom, I totally contemplated going into GI Joe next door, just to avoid having to finish it)I decided that Sarah totally owed me.

And to repay her debt, the deal was she had to see Fame, which we all knew she would dislike as much as I hated the cooking show. After all, fair is fair. And to make things even more horrifying for her, I planned on buying all three of us matching leg warmers to wear to the theater.

BUT, somehow the night of the show Sarah mysteriously "couldn't make it." Now, being the kind friends that Bridget and I are, we graciously let her off the hook without so much as a protest.

However, we forgave but didn't forget. And now, the stakes have gotten higher. She has forced our hand into retaliating with a show she will find even MORE disturbingly torturous.

The Michael Jackson movie.

Bridget and I are stoked about seeing it---can't wait to get our dance on. And I guarantee the three of us will be wearing a glove to the theater, if I have anything to say about it. Yes, Sarah will be using her glove to hide her face, but she knows we mean business.
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Wrapping up Halloween:

So, it was fun and fabulous and this was the year that Park learned candy corns exist. Eventually, I knew it would happen.

On Friday he has his first dentist appointment, so fingers crossed that the almost 4 years of pre-candy corn knowledge will count for something.

Happy (Early) Halloween!

Great Expectations

So I'm finding out that life with two kids is definitely full.

Full of laughs...full of love...and full of laundry!

But you won't find me complaining (most of the time, anyway) because I couldn't be more thankful. A few nights ago, when both our kiddos were sleeping soundly, I looked over at Chris and said, "These are the sweetest days. The ones we will look back on when our kids have long since flown the nest and we are old and gray. We'll sit on the porch and rock as we reflect on the memories of what we are living right this very moment."

He smiled and agreed with me. And then promised to remind me of that on the days when the kids are whining and fussing for no good reason.

Point taken.

Thankfully, the seond time around I'm able to fully enjoy this season of motherhood.

When pregnant with Park, I often daydreamed of tenderly tucking my sweet baby in for the night, while singing softly as he or she magically drifted off into peaceful dreams.

After all, that is exactly how it happens in the commercials. One quick flip of that little Ocean Wonder light show and "Junior" is snoring before you can even say Fisher Price.

Maybe if we had named Park "Junior" things would have turned out differently.

In all seriousness, I had longed my whole life for motherhood. But although I had spent a lifetime imagining what it would be like, the reality of my first months of mothering did not line up with my expectations.

After a very difficult delivery, I found myself suffering a series of major health problems in the ensuing months. Couple that with Park’s respiratory issues, inability to sleep more than an hour at a time, a husband in the throws of a new job, and my coping mechanism became non existent.

Initially, I had no idea I was suffering from Postpartum Depression. Having never had a baby before, I mistakenly assumed this was what every new mom felt. When my midwife had covered Postpartum Depression during my pregnancy visits, I didn’t pay much attention since I “knew” this could never happen to me. And from what I could recall, if I truly had this type of depression I would be crying all the time and feeling very unattached to my baby.

Actually, the opposite was true in my situation. I was overly attentive to every little detail of my son. I felt no one was capable of meeting his needs other than me and obsessed over the smallest decisions, such as how to dress Park…would he be too hot? …too cold? I started feeling trapped, suffering from irrational fears of something happening to my family. I began to have anxiety attacks and found it impossible to sleep, even on the rare occasion that my baby actually was. All of these things were so out of character for me, yet I still thought it was just growing pains of becoming a new mom.

Postpartum Depression is real. It is not something you can talk, think, exercise, or pray your way out of, although all these things are valuable in the recovery process. It is a medical condition that needs treatment and there is nothing shameful about seeking help to feel like your old self again.

Unfortunately, it is also something not often discussed. After I began to share my story, I was amazed at the number of women in my life that had suffered a similar journey.

If you are experiencing Postpartum Depression, you are not alone. Do not suffer silently. Join the many women who have had the courage to speak up, demanding the help they so desperately needed.

For me, experiencing motherhood the second time around has been completely different. I had no idea just how much Postpartum Depression had robbed from me until having Presli. Being able to fully enjoy our new baby is a priceless gift and it breaks my heart that I missed out on so much of that with Park. And even though I've never discussed it publicly before, having Presli affirmed in me the need to share my experience with anyone who will listen. I pray God uses me to encourage other women and to prevent anyone else from missing the signs of needing help.

And as for my expectaions the second time around, I'd be lying if I didn't say we contemplated naming Presli "Junior". However, we opted to just buy her the Ocean Wonder light show instead.

Let's just say it was money well spent:)

Happy One Month, Baby Girl!

Presli,

You are one loved little girl! Here is a glimpse into your life at a month....

Your Eating Schedule:
During the day you eat about every 3 hours, and usually only because I wake you up. You are a great nurser, but if you don't want to eat, no one could possibly convince you otherwise. You are very fast and efficient, nursing no more than 10 minutes on each side.

Your Sleeping Schedule:
You sleep very well! (That is a HUGE praise, considering we prayed that over you in the womb after having your "up all day and all night" brother:) You typically fall asleep easily on your own with your pacifier and take 5-6 naps that last usually last between 1- 2 hours each. At night, you mostly go to sleep around 8:30 and I wake you to feed again before I go to bed around 10:30 or 11. You wake to eat between 3:30 and 4 and sleep again until waking for the day about 7:30. We are completely amazed by this!!!

Your Likes:
You LOVE your pacifier (and your brother loves to give it to you!), to swing, the car, the sling, to be swaddled, to sit on my lap, to hold hands, and to nuzzle your face against mine.

Your Dislikes:
Cold wet wipes during diaper changes and having your fingernails cut

Things That Make Me Laugh:
The way you love to stretch, the manly grunting you do when irritated, how you love your hands glued to your face when sleeping (just like Park!), how you tickle my side as you nurse, how your eyes bug out and you get the "o" face when ready to fall asleep, how calm and still you are (this one makes me laugh because I'm not used to this), the way Park says,"It's OK, Baby Girl. Super Bubby is here!", as he rushes to your side at the first sign of you fussing.

We adore you, Presli. You are a perfect addition to our family. Everything about you was worth the wait and we are treasuring every minute with you.

How Big is Presli?

SO BIG!!!!!


It has been a fun first 3 weeks, Baby Girl.